It’s been many
months since I sat down to write a blog entry.
I have many notes on my desk for posts and yet, as many people can
relate to, something draws me away from my To Do List. Any yet, here I am at the computer on a
beautiful sunny fall day in Pittsburgh.
A letter to
Ask Amy that appeared in our local newspaper caught my eye. The writer was thanking Amy for advocating
for people to make “end of life” decisions.
The writer told her story of discussing The Decision with her own mother
and noting the amount of pushback she faced from mom. It turned out the real reason for mom’s behavior
was the perceived cost of legal fees.
The writer
investigated the mom’s state Department of Aging website and found numerous services
including a free phone call with a lawyer and downloadable forms for a simple
will, powers of attorney and DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) form. Mom’s bank had a notary who notarized the appropriate
forms for free.
Mom lived
for another 20 years after the process and the writer felt at peace knowing she
was able to carry out her mom’s wishes in the end.
Bottom line,
sometimes what we think we know, we really don’t. Good listening skills are important and
asking skillful and thoughtful questions can make the journey easier. This is especially true when the journey is
made in partnership – usually child with parent, friend with friend, partner
with partner.
Ask yourself
if you are prepared to have THE discussion with yourself or a loved one. If not, think about what you have to do to
get prepared. I suggest when you talk to
your self, pretend you are talking to a friend.
Help that friend get organized and investigate what documents are needed
in your state. Wills and Powers of
Attorney are your responsibility.
I, of course, welcome comments. What has been your experience with loved ones
or your own preparation? Do you have a
will, healthcare power of attorney, financial power of attorney?
